To work or not work that is the question

So I have started doing my KIT (keep in touch days) at work . For those of you that don't. Know what they are , they are a number of days allocated to someone on maternity leave to use up to ease their way back to work. I don't actually start work till 4 th June, but I have decided to use up my kit days and help 'get back into work mode.'
I went into work today and just basically shadowed another teacher with the group of students that I will be with when I go back.  I got up early this morning (no change there) and left the kids with the hubby to sort out. It was actually the first time I have left my baby boy ALL day with his dad. It was hard.

However,once I got to work, it was like I never left!! I had a good day actually felt brain challenged rather than baby brain ! I managed to have a peaceful cup of tea and cake without worrying a toddler was going to knock it over, without rushing and having to deal with sticky hands and , taking to the toilet and changing the nappy half way through my cup of tea. It was a very nice cup of tea indeed. I didn't have my toddler wanting a bite of my cake, or wanting to dip a biscuit in my tea and then having to drink tea with softened biscuit, errgh.  Lunch was even better! I only ate MY lunch .  I felt selfish for once.

All the time I was there I thought of my babies. We're they ok? Has the nappy been changed, have they eaten? Has my daughter been to the toilet? Are they crying? Has my baby had a nap? Even though they were with their dad I still worried.

Was it worth all the worry? The telephone calls back to hubby asking if they are ok? I don't know.
I really don't. But selfishly I enjoyed work, I enjoyed spending the day with adults, I loved interacting with other people, I adored the social aspect of work. Is that bad? And best of all, I absolutely 100 percent was delighted to spend the day without the kids.

This was a one off.  If only life was this easy. The selfless act of being a mother almost instantly feels better than being selfish.

Have you gone back to work recently after maternity leave? What are your thoughts?

Honey I took the kids to school and....

So I m not sure if I mentioned in my earlier posts that I am a SEN teacher at a special school and I work with adults age 16-18. So yesterday I decided to take the kids into school to ' show them off' as we speak. I thought its time I took the baby in before my maternity ends.. And just go see everyone. Besides there's a new 'cafebar' opened that is manned by the post 16 students themselves as part of ' work experience' .. So I could get a drink aswell whilst in there and see the students in action.
 Firstly, two year old had a melt down in the car screaming as she thought I was taking her to the Sure Start centre, which I am sure I made clear we were going to go there AFTER the school. Anyway I managed to settle her by distraction of the snow flakes! What wonderful creation!!
 We got into the school and was seated very politely by one of the students and then our orders were taken.
Well then it started because she got the non ending compliments of ' oh how beautiful are you? ,and .. How old are you? And pretty dress and love your hair etc etc... With her head tucked under my cardigan I wondered how long that would last. She peeped through and started screaming and giggling.. I immediately felt embarrassed!! Trying to shush her discreetly and bribe her with chocolates if she went quiet was my sorry tactic I used. She did eventually quieten down but I realised the more attention she got the more excited she became  and the more excited she became the more she wanted to jump up and down and scream.
Well lets put it this way, it was an entertaining morning and .. The students were entertained.

I went home that day thinking that my work colleagues probably think I have a devil of a daughter and discipline is not really my strongest asset. However the baby was an angel...
I won't be doing that again. Not for a looooong time.

How I entertained my toddler

It's pretty hard entertaining a two half year when you have a 7 month old baby and a grown man to look after. Idea of entertainment for the Man is to plonk my daughter in front of the tele.. Yes she will watch it but its not really mind stimulating and I have been told its not really good for them.
Well I had a busy morning yesterday and hubby had come back from a night shift so I got up with the kids and gave them breakfast ,while the MR went to bed.
I noticed we had an opened box of chocolate rice crispies and golden balls from Aldi. So I decided to make chocolate crispies bun thingies with my daughter..

Oh how she was kept entertained for atleast 45 minutes. I asked her politely if she would break up the chocolate into pieces .. She did that extremely well. Ofcourse many pieces fell to the floor. Good job I bought an extra packet of cooking chocolate that I secretly warmed up in the microwave!
Then I gave her the box of crispies and golden balls and she poured them into the melted chocolate and stirred the ingredients altogether. This took a while as the golden balls had a larger surface area and were fighting their way through the chocolate almost as if they didn't want to be covered!! Huff puff.
The best bit came next.
I showed Lissa how to scoop the mix and pour into the bun case using the spoon and to my surprise she picked up extremely well. The face of concentration and utter perfection was a photo opportunity NOT to miss. Then Ofcourse it's no fun without sprinkles!! I gave her a tub of sprinkles and told her to pour her heart out. I promised myself I wasn't going to get worked up about the mess on the floor. Who cares if there's drops of messy melted chocolate and rise crispies and sprinkles all over the floor?! Only my 7 month old will roll over and be covered in it and maybe use his fine motor skills to pick up the sprinkles and eat them! SHOCK HORROR. Well I got to them before he did.
See. It can be fun baking with a two year old. And keeping SHTUM about the mess somehow makes me feel free!
Go ahead try it. Pour your heart out.